*Self-belief – trust in your own abilities.
*Confidence – the quality of being certain of your own ability to do things well.
*Dream – to imagine something that you would like to happen.
* Cambridge English Dictionary
This is a personal story, and my hope is that by sharing it you feel inspired to follow your dreams.
The Early Years
When I was around seven years old, I joined the school choir. I dreamed of being a singer and actress (more about that later.)
I wasn’t in the choir for long.
One day the teacher walked up and down the long lines of children, ear almost to the floor, and then she stopped. Right in front of me. Looked at me and said, “You can’t sing. You’re tone deaf and you need to leave.” So many emotions surged through me. Disappointment, horror, and embarrassment to name but a few.
I left the choir and I’ve no idea what I did instead, but I didn’t dwell on things too much in those days. Later in life I did and maybe that stemmed from here. Who knows.
I carried on with school, always believing I couldn’t sing, I couldn’t follow my dreams. The put-downs didn’t stop there. I went through most of my school life being bullied so when I had to “choose” my GCSE subjects, I made sure I picked drama. (I wonder why I didn’t choose music.) I could escape the bullying on stage and become someone else. Except it didn’t quite work out like that. For the entire time I was studying for my GSCE’s my drama teacher was off sick and a string of supply teachers followed. I learned no drama and subsequently failed. (No actress status for me then!) Although, by doing my English homework in those lessons, I did pass my English exams so every cloud and all that…
Before I go any further, I would like to say, this isn’t a rant about the education system. Nor is it a complaint about missed opportunities. It’s a reminder that our decisions, choices and circumstances have a knock-on effect on everyone around us. Whether they are deemed to be good, bad, or indifferent is in the mind of the individual. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t make those decisions. We have to do what is right for us and by doing that, we allow everyone and everything we need to enter our lives.
Now
In the past few months, I have had many opportunities, one of which is a radio show on Black Country Radio Xtra, Writing, Wellbeing and a Little Bit of Woo-Woo. Whilst recording a couple of these shows, Billy Spakemon (show producer) and I have burst into song. Sometimes with guests, sometimes not.
I warned him I couldn’t sing. But I did it anyway.
Shortly after this he got me up on stage at one of his events (I still don’t know how this happened) and I sang the chorus of one of his songs with him.
I was flooded with emotions for so many reasons.
- I was honoured to share the stage with him and sing the chorus of a song which I know is close to his heart.
- I remember thinking I was born for this, I should be on stage.
- Then. Imposter syndrome took over. No you’re not. You’ve been told you can’t sing, what are you doing?
- I felt like a fraud and in that split second I decided I had to find out for sure. Can I sing?… (I’m sure Billy wouldn’t have allowed me to sing if he thought I was that bad, but I needed to know.)
So, I did it. I met with a lovely singing coach, Laura Phillips and… drum roll, please… she told me I CAN sing!!! (Talk about life changing. Thank you Laura.) I need a little help to bring my voice out. After 40 years you can imagine how I felt. And yes, I signed up for singing lessons there and then.
What About You?
This isn’t an isolated situation. I was talking to someone last week who had the same thing happen to him. It goes to show the power and influence we can have on someone’s life.
Don’t let anyone shatter your dreams. Follow your heart, believe in yourself, and have the confidence to go for what you want. Most important of all if you need help with something. Ask. As I said to my wonderful writing group last week, “I could have been a rock star.” One of them responded, “You still could.”
I’m feeling all sorts of emotions since my singing lesson, but the boost it’s given me is off the scale and I want you. Yes, you who’s reading this, to take a little of that confidence and apply it to your situation.
What do you want or need to change?
What, if anything have you believed for a long time, which probably isn’t true?
Have you taken the time recently to reconnect with yourself and listen to your inner knowing?
Do you want to make the changes and follow your dreams?
Take a small step to make that change.
Do something different from your usual routine.
Believe in yourself.
Do it today. Do it now. Live your life, not someone else’s.
Thank you for reading, enjoy your day.
Lots of Love, Light & Gratitude
Lisa xxx
If you would like to contact me or need my help, please email lisa@lisambillingham.com